Baby update

I thought I'd drop in with a little update on the baby.  She's still here.  I'm still here.  We're still here.  :)

It's been about six weeks since we found out she had a one percent chance of survival, but she's still plugging along.  I had an amniocentesis a few weeks ago to confirm the Trisomy 18 diagnosis, but the results came back negative for any chromosomal defects.  The doctors were surprised and stunted and I was ecstatic, thinking this meant she might make it.  I went along thinking this for a week, until one sweet doctor had the courage to tell me that wasn't likely to happen.

I don't envy their job.  It would be so difficult to deliver bad news to hopeful parents.  We hear things from many different doctors and most seem to skirt around the truth enough that I'm left feeling confused with a false sense of hope.  I think it takes a truly gifted doctor to be able to give it to you straight, while still being sensitive.  

The hardest part through this all, is that I have connected with my baby over the last six weeks with such increased intensity.  When you wonder if each day will be the last, it's hard to think of much else.  Most of the time I'm able to feel peace in the knowledge that however things turn out, I'll be with her again, but other days I'm just plain old sad.

I sincerely appreciate the continued thoughts and prayers during such a difficult time.

Natalie

Camping trip

We took the kids camping over President's Day weekend.  You have to know that Zac and I loathe camping.  It's dirty, it's way too much work and when you get home everything including your car smells like campfire.  However, our kids love it and I grew up with an avid backpacker/camper for a father.  The combination of these two things make me feel obligated to take my kids on an overnighter a couple times a year.

Our favorite "camping" spot is twenty minutes away, has electricity, running water and the cleanest bathroom/showers you've ever seen.  Unfortunately for us, they were full so we had to head to a more primitive spot a little further away.  No showers, no electricity and no running water.

Our camping trip ended up being one of those camping trips.  There was no moon, which means total darkness at night, it was freezing, we hadn't packed enough firewood, Zac and I had to sleep in different tents and I ended up with the air mattress with a small leak.  An hour after we all headed to bed, my mattress was completely deflated and I was officially sleeping on gravel.  Then to top it all off, I woke up with a stomach bug.

My kids have seen me puke so many times with this pregnancy that they don't even flinch.  They all yelled, "Daaaad.  Mom's throwing up," and then they were off to the park like it was no biggie.

Needless to say, it will be a good while before I plan another overnighter…unless it's in the backyard…and doesn't include me.